no one will drink with you if you continue to listen to beyonce
k so who do I think I'm kidding applying to culinary school? I just fucked up a microwaveable pizza
I wish i had more things to dip in ranch... That's the most stoner thing i've ever said
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
Just woke up bloody and clutching a rear view mirror I'm pretty sure is from my car. For those of you keeping score at home this is why I stopped drinking four loko.
Maybe we could get a groupon for vasectomy. I'm game.
Looking forward to meeting the person naked and passed out at my kitchen table.
I walked outside an you were laying down talking to a star about your life. That's when I took the bottle of jack away...
Well then sir I'll probably see you tomorrow after my class and at 3 with your clothes off. Sounds like a solid way to start the weekend to me
Really? I thought your parents stopped loving you when you drunkenly fell through the ceiling...
For context, I was hiding under the pong table mooing at everyone by that point.
Remember when we were coked out at that house and we were trying to meditate in the bathroom? Who's house were we at?
Took it for the first time last night, and i saw a giant pillsbury boy coming after me with a wrench in his hand.
Think he has a gf
Yea that shit doesn’t necessarily stop me
So... he's my second cousin's step-bro... To do or not to do?
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