So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
I keep getting texted pictures of my husband with other men. I can't figure out if he wants a divorce or a threesome?
she was handing out condoms w/ her number on them...
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
Also, the wait staff kept prematurely clearing my Manhattans. Not sure if it was an oversight or a hint.
Sorry we're taking so long, this weed cake tastes amazing with Tabasco sauce on it.
He's probably hung over. I sure as hell am. I want to pop out my eyeballs with a fork and soak them in cold water
I got drunk enough that when camel suggested jumping off the pier, I thought it was a fantastic plan. Also my blood hurts.
I WANT MY VAGINA TO POUND AT NICE THINGS.
I need to hump something and I know u understand.
SHE BROUGHT HER PARROT TO THE PARTY. IT SQUAWKS EVERY TIME SOMEONE VOMITS LIKE 'PARTY FOUL SQUAWKKKKKK'
That awkward moment when you bring a guy back to your place then have to tell him you only have magnums.
That's because I've spent the past 21 years convincing my parents the only emotions I have are sarcasm and bitterness.
I can't be a daydrinker without you. It just doesn't work.
I love you too.
Randomize