She is making me post-sex grilled cheese at 2 am wearing only shorts and cowboy boots. I am so in love
So currently I have a block of cheese duct taped to my air conditioner in lieu of a fridge.
I was unaware that a tutu and pasties was appropriate attire to this
Dude, she introduced me to her best friend form Russia and she was a 10. Her other Russian friend was even hotter. How did communism fail?
Mike is so stoned. I just heard him quietly mutter to himself "rock a piss" as he walked down the hall to the bathroom
It's like the bermuda triangle of cat puke
no, I didn't go in the end. Too hungover and hot, plus Star Wars is on so obviously I'm having a naked day.
why does CNN give a flying $@*# about the royal baby so, so much?
i hope they name him Joffrey
You were drink-wine-from-the-bottle drunk trying to take everybody's blood pressures again.
Don't forget to make sex 3rd on your calander
Just for the record, I did not have sex in your bed. Happy 4th of July.
I just wanna be naked and go frolic in the snow
The neighbors in the apartment above us are at it again. The roleplay this time is cop and prostitute. I give it 30 minutes, you? Already sounds better than the last one
i just found a pair of your underwear stuffed behind my harry potter books...was that on purpose?
haha no, it was majik
Her pegging playlist is all heavy metal so stay away if you wanna keep your ass intact
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