guess who just trotted in eating her oats and wagging her penis
he literaly had industrial grade plastic underneth his blankets
Right now, my father is sitting on the couch, totally smashed, crying, eating pringles, and watching the credits of Transformers 2. Love him.
getting kicked in the face by someone doing a keg stand. just my luck
I wouldn't necessarily say I'm in her pants...I'd say I'm more on the on ramp to the freeway to the long way to her pants. There really isn't a short cut.
i should not be allowed to orgasm that much in one day.
At the airport and im So hungover. Think anyone will help if I put a note on me reading "flying to Boston, please wake me as we board" and then passing back out?
I'm glad we're going to catch up. too bad it's over my vagina.
I told the guy that if he didn't put enough pepperoni to earn the name " pepperoni feast", that I was gonna sue him for all he had. Believe it or not, that's all I remember.
And i have once again masturbated to an amazing soundtrack. what a time to be alive
he can suck his own dick, i cant compete with that
Well I got black out drunk before the rehearsal dinner and berated my family with insults. But other then that it was a good time
All I need is to get out and get laid
Yeah mom sounds like a good idea! Now send that message to the person it was ment for
I just watched two birds fight or fuck. It was crazy. Another bird was watching closer and I know that bird understood what was happening better than me.
we cut you off when you started chasing with your slim fast shake
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