I left my toothbrush at her house. This is getting way too serious for me.
Protip: If you slur the word 'tipsy', you've progressed beyond tipsy.
It's sad that the best source of heat that I have is my vaporizer.
maybe next time you'll take an ex boyfriend warning you that she's batshit crazy as a warning instead of a challenge
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
She fucked me for a ride to the airport. If this is what the rest of college is like, I'm never graduating.
All i remember is Liz dragging me home yelling at me, crying, and barfing
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
And as cleavage season comes to a close, so blooms a new season of yoga pants. And the people rejoiced.
well apparently i was just calling everyone cunts. then i awoke from my blackout to 3 very mad roommates who didn't bring a key out with them
I wonder if go pro can customize a cock ring so I don't have to hold the camera anymore
I think you might be the first man ever to describe getting a blowjob as "neat"
Dude how much would someone have to pay you to get you to slide your vagina across a bald man's head because Honestly I'd do it for the experience alone. but money would be nice too\n\nI'm thinkin like 500 bucks. Maybe 700
Why are you like this.
Of course I'm watching space shows while stoned on the science channel. Why would I want to learn while not baked out of my skull?
I just realized I have a habit of pre gaming for therapy visits. Problem?
We'll discuss it when you get here
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