It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
I felt like I was in a real life creepy Myspace message. "girl u cute" ... "girl u got a really nice smile"
the amount of blow i got, New years should last a week.
med student doing my blood work at the AIDS clinic just hit on me after I told him i was having unprotected sex, but didn't think i had HIV.
Swallowing. Like you said. Lions. Always.
We are without power. He took ALL the lightbulbs out and hid them.
I mean, on what planet are nipples suppose to look like that?
This is a mass text. I will facerape you if you bring me Fierce Melon Gatorade and 4 D batteries.
There's a man with a stuffed dog and a can of dog food on the L. Should I break it to him?
Best not to. Some people need their delusions.
We christened the whole apartment and fucked on the balcony. It was amazing. I'm 100% sure downtown heard me climax. Now we can unpack.
leave me alone I'm becoming one with nature and doing plant things
how did you set a fucking salad on fire????????
Fucked him in a graveyard. Need plan b.
It was like if the scent of sour milk and burning tires had a baby in taste form.
Okay, let's just all take a step back and think about how funny this will seem in like a year... Maybe 2 if his nose is actually broken.
Randomize