just bought miller high life, hungry man dinners, and a bottle of lube. you win life, you win.
so he came on my face and then proceeded to say "that was just how i imagined it would happen"
where do you find these guys?
She told you broke her computer after the little square in tetris wouldn't rotate for you...
Her parents came home early, i had to hug her mom with a condom on...
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
the caf people were giving us weird looks and she yelled ITS A LIFE STYLE
Hey, just wanted to let you know that University Police stopped by and repossessed the stolen laundry basket. And the 8 bottles of detergent.
Just because you can put your penis in it does not make it "good stuff".
Yeah her jello shots are the next closest thing to a lethal injection. That potent.
I promised him we could have sex if he would let me take him to the hospital to get stitches.
Pretty sure I was impersonating Rihanna when I kept asking him what my name was while we were making out
I have like three friends I don't have sex with, what did you expect
Plus you need some new dick in your life, the environment is fucked enough you don’t have to recycle anymore 😂💀
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
He’s perfect! He listens to Genesis during sex and has a VW bus!
You really are from the panhandle, aren’t you?
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