kristin has been a bad kristin
had to check his id this morning to remember his name.... i was wayy off
I've been watching too much manswers. Cuz i know scissoring doesn't work on a motorcycle.
you can feel better about your life now. i slept with a guy who has gold teeth
I wish I could but I can't. No beer pong or sex on a hammock...such an unproductive weekend
She said we "made love." I had to explain to her that when both parties agree that the first time time they have sex both people agree to video tape the whole thing its not "making love" but more like random good time fun sex.
I am still sore from last night. I can't wait for you to meet my parents.
Holy shit he's circumcised. His parents must have really loved him.
That's the fall semester you first snorted drugs off my ass I think
Why is there ANOTHER stolen fire extinguisher in my room? You know that's a felony right...
A party without a piñata is not a party I want to attend.
Don't judge me 👊🏼 his dick just whispers my name
Ehh, the third backed out. Two still isn't bad. Who gets a bootycall to pick them up from a bootycall's house anyways? Only me.
I did what i always do when i miss him; masturbate and watch Bridges of Madison County.
is it bad that there is a girl in my bed right now and the only thing i can think about is the fect that its after 3am which means i cant order jimmyjohns unitll tomorrow?
Randomize
