Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
I just saw "i'm bigger then that" as her facebook status. Would it be better to make a fat joke or correct her grammar?
Idk. I woke up marinating in beer on my beanbag. Idk what you mightve done.
Is YOLO really just a socially acceptable way to say you enjoy putting things up your nose?
according to last night, I underestimated the size of my mouth and the possibilities of what can fit into it.
You're dating a nurse! That's smart, you never know when you'll have a medical emergency. Probably liver failure.
I thought you wanted to talk?
What part of "Lets have angry sex" means I want to talk?
I went from naked with lasts nights hookup to Ihop in 6 minutes flat
I think that's a new house record
I was riding him and in the middle he literally said "fuck yeah, Amy Winehouse"
YOU LEFT MY FUCKING BRA OUTSIDE OF YOUR HOUSE AND NEVER TEXTED ME.
I'm shaving my vagina to the lion king soundtrack. How's your 9am?
At one point I was counting his nipple hairs to calm myself down.
my boobs just made me lose a game of beer pong. the balls hit them, bounced off and into the cup. twice. ive never been so disappointed in them.
He is completely naked, curled in a ball, and rocking back and forth in the shower humming lullabies to himself. This is your responsibility since I'm going to be fucking someone in 5.7 seconds.
Randomize
