Our Neighbors are trying to steal our ducks!
y did u give ur computer a hand job?
Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
Dude, TWO hot chicks on jeopardy tonight. gonna be a good one
Dude, I am so turned on right now. Hot chick with glasses from brooklyn is absolutely crushing right now, taking whole categories. might beat off to jeapordy...
do another line during during the commercial and make the magic happen during double jeopardy.
Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
I haven't been able to trust a girl since spanks came out
It's been so long since i rode in a trunk. I'm riding in a trunk btw
All I remember was endless tequila and pulling karate moves from 3 Ninjas Kick Back towards the guy at 7 Eleven. Explanation?
I have her designated blowjob hair tie on my wrist. It's like a key to eternal happiness
Lots of alcohol last night skiing this morning = me throwing up off chairlift
I wonder what chicks would think if they learned that when we add them on fb we email their bikini pics to each other.
So his shoes are still here. And there are three contacts in a case. And a shirt on the bed. I've checked my dorm and he's not here. I'm so confused.
Lmfao. We asked what you wanted to eat and you said vagina. I don't care what kind. Fresh, barbecue, roasted on a camp fire. I just want it on my taste buds.
When you wake up to a porn star on your couch telling you, you better tell your boyfriend about last night.
The Domino's delivery guy is in front of me at The Wendy's drive-through. Hmmm.....
Randomize
