I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
Im glad youre not pregnant with that New Jersey assholes baby. Your vagina would have smelled worse than Newark.
I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
kerrys trying to convince everyone in the bar shes a lesbian. cheers to not being the drunkest girl in the room. i probably wont piss myself tonight.
I'm gonna play a drinking game called "Sarah takes the train"
I had to explain to the waiter that I'm not the DD because I can't drive, but as the Designated 'Make Sure No One Gets Roofied Or Hit By A Car On The Walk Home'-er, I should still get the free drinks.
ummm im also counting the $14 dollars I gave the old guy to pay for the cab I called for him to take to the hospital last night as part of ur present.
How are you getting in?
I know some influential drag queens
I was so ripped I had a natty light box over my head carrying a spray bottle out in the streets trying to give car washes.
yeah that bottle of rum is only the second thing I want that kid to be pulling out of his pants
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
Accidentally made a bowl of macaroni and cheese with a bottle of vodka. It's not that bad
I was pretty pissed in the morning when I realized he had fucked the fake tattoo right off my chest.
I just put my eye make up on in the bathroom of the bar.... I may be too comfortable here....
Randomize
