But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
she insisted that i refer to her boobs by name.
I already brushed my teeth, and it's not even noon yet. Today's going to be a productive day.
She said "don't make this weird" and then proceeded to sniff me.
3 things I learned last night: 1.) I'm not as light as I used to be. 2.) Sex on the roof of a convertible is a really bad idea. 3.) The hospital now has super glue pens for sealing minor cuts instead of stitches!
Just saw a girl duct tape a cigarette back together..I feel like my life is shambles for being present for this
i can't believe he threw up on you. Well thats what you get for being DD. I used the sombreros as a shield!
Nothing bad can happen when you have a kiwi flavored condom. Absolutely nothing.
Doing the walk of shame and bringing my dad a newspaper en route. Favourite daughter status confirmed.
well i don't NEED my liver but it's nice to have one when you're trying to have a good time
I'm home, and it turns out she didn't get it all. still picking Oreos out of my pubes.
I smell like heartbreak.
Tequila and sloppy rebound sex?
How did you know?
I am drunkenly riding a razor scooter up and down the hills of Cincinnati
What in the fuck are you doing with your life
So he apologized for peeing on my floor.. then we fucked all night.
Real classy
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