Hurry. And bring back up. SHE WON'T STOP TALKING.
just the thought makes me want to clean my vag with a clorox wipe
i was so high that i was eating crumbs of my bed only to realize they were fuzz thingies. fml.
Quick, to the slutcave!
She was that classic mixture between "Hell no" and "Why the fuck not."
I'll have to explain it to you tonight when i call drunk. It will sound better
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
She literally just puked and rallied AT HER OWN WEDDING. Welcome to White Trash town, America.
I just found a wine bottle in my shower. Must have been a good night.
Ok roommate is officially weird. Just watched her microwave the same broccoli 3 times in a row and cry b/c she fucked it up. Wtf lol
Why do I always miss the parties you're naked at?!
I get naked cuz your not there
how many ponies have to be on my pajama pants to convince him im gay?
i think we need a new approach.
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
If I get laid tonight it will 1.) Prove that the sex gods do in fact exist, and 2.) Show that I am one motherfucking badass bitch.
Just watched a middle age white woman scream WHY DON'T YOU GO FUCK YOURSELF, HELEN?! Helen seemed absolutely scandalized.
Randomize