Picking up third year law school girls is like MILF hunting for beginners
Thanks for the birthday present, i had so much fun playing with it
Are you talking about my vagina?
My T9 text prediction thing keeps predicting every next word is going to be "midgets".
I think i found piece of your tooth in my dick this morning when i took a shower
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
I think throwing up in my her purse is probably why we broke up
He's not so smart and obsessed with sex and lacks listening comprehension skills. I feel like i'm dating a sexually competent sesame street character.
She sat on the toilet backwards so that she could hold onto the back part for balance. No she's not ready to go home.
I need more social interactions that don't involve sex
Neighbour is sobbing. Difficult to masturbate.
Watching the blind side bc I need a good cry to make sure I'm still human after this weekend's questionable life choices
Eating breakfast at 1:30 in the afternoon stark naked is how everyone should live
At one point in the night, as we were running from the cops, I clearly remember you yelling "little gnomes are tickling the insides of my body!" ...that high.
I told him I wanted to get on him and ride him to Montana. It didnt end like i thought it would.
I’ll always remember that day you sent me that random nude on accident lmao changed my life
Randomize
