just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
sleeping like a two year old who chased ambien with a bottle of whiskey.
Where's the Hot Mess Express headed tonight?
I hope that's not the new nickname for my friends and me.
you spent the like half the night trying to figure out the puzzles on the back of the captn crunch box
This morning two of his housemate threw confetti over me, started singing and handed me a make shift trophy out of cereal boxes and beer cans that said 'Harry's Virginity' on it. Fucking brilliant!
I would fuck him In a heartbeat, an obese child running up stairs with an irregular heartbeat, heartbeat.
Just stared at a tree for a solid 5 minutes because I thought a German Shepard was perched on a limb.
You sat on a wall pretending to be a gargoyle before shouting "batman!" and jumping at me
I'm the drunk Des Moines deserves, but not the one it needs
to have them in my mouth would be like meeting a unicorn while floating on a cloud of glitter
Nothing like waking up and watching Dr. Phil and masturbating. It's like a protein shake for the day.
All I'm sayin is that I don't want to raise anything. Or deal with anything. Or having anything come out of my vagina. I mean, I don't think that's asking too much.
Blame the bisexuality and move on?
I went home with him again and he LEFT HIS OWN HOUSE at 2 in the morning while I was IN THE BATHROOM.
So after we found out he wasnt throwing up blood in was just hawaiian punch and we all failed breathalyzers the cop drove us around like a taxi and brought us back to the apartment
She did what?
Who. The correct term is she did who.
Did you see him? The correct term is definitely what.
Randomize
