Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
Dude if you're in another zip code it doesn't count
You don't understand. I'm not like you.
We just took the batteries out of the fire alarm to play the breathalyzer game. I love college.
It's cute how he thinks we're going to have sex again
all i could think was her face looked like a farm accident
You should know I just got pulled aside by TSA because they found a bottle of Bud Light in my backpack... Thanks for that...
Were playing bathroom attendees at the party and making people wash their hands
i made a dollar
Technically my penis started a fight tonight
I can't even remember the last time I took my own pants off
I may, or may not have licked his face in an Applebee's.
Dude. Where are you? I'm making waffles in the waffle iron. It's beautiful.
Drugs are gluten free tho, right?
so when he he finally wandered back into the room it was with a pound of cream cheese which he ate in 5 minutes flat and then passed out
A fair warning: I don't think a cop will let you off the hook just because your birthday is on New Year's Eve
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
Randomize
