omg... punch me in the throat... I am about to lose my mind with my parents.. I'm not saying I agree with the menendez brothers.. but I understand
He sent me a video of himself jacking off. I am not kidding.
WTF??? Isn't he married??
Yeah but his wife is at a birthday party and I guess he's bored. LOL
just had a dream there were parent teacher conferences in college...scariest dream ever.
i don't know at this point bringing the fog horn might be a good idea...
Just to be safe, you should be prepared to jump out of a second story window
it was all good until he screamed "for fraaannnceee" on his last thrust
we are all four or five tequila-induced decisions away from shitting in a bucket, come get me please.
All I can think of is a mama duck followed by her baby ducks, in brightly colored track shoes.
How high are you?
I don't know, I think having hemorrhoids shows character. You have to be trying pretty hard to get them.
PENIS EMOJIS WOULD MAKE MY LIFE SO MUCH EASIER GAH WHY DOES THE WORLD HATE ME
At least they play good movies in the waiting room of the pregnancy resource center.
I met his parents. We played twister. My boob popped out.
If you fuck her..... You will be in great danger. Like in so much danger it would be like walking into a pit of crocodiles who haven't eaten and you also just stole their baby.
What the hell kind of sad excuse for a bottom are you
He’s 48, has a Prince Albert piercing and a white Range Rover
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