You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
watching jon and kate + 8 right now is like watching my parents split up
He said he only talked to me because I talk dirty in bed.
Yeah! I got cockblocked by the blizzard last night. Lost girl on way to my apartment. Not a joke
and then he said "my sister has the same underwear!" please come get me.
Ah that type of Dick. I think my phones trying to make me less of a whore by capitalizing Dick. That way it looks like I'm talking about a dude not penis
I was blowdrying my hair this morning and I swear to god it smelled like franzia
For my job application I just put "community gardener- personal business" for my previous work experience in place of the neighborhood pot grower/distributor
He wants to know how I lost my bra in his pants....id like to know too
i just added no after every hockey player in my phone..
No just sleep deprived. James woke me up at 7 and forced me to eat a hot pocket with him cause he " didn't want me to die".
We're already drunk. 4 hours to go still. And there's a bear advisory. TOP WEEKEND.
This morning he fucked me while I was brushing my teeth. So I kept brushing as he thrusted. Then I brushed his teeth with my toothbrush while he was still in me. So hygienic.
lets go to sea world and you can just hit on every guy in a wetsuit until you get lucky
I just upped my southern womanhood. Taking whiskey and Kleenex pocket packs to the funeral.
Randomize
