do you think they make "congratulations unfit mother" greeting cards?
or abortion recommendation cards.
True Life: I hate vaginal excretions
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
we convinced you the moon was a planet...again
I just got home. Seriously all I remember is taking out my contacts and putting your balls in my mouth.
ive decided something. ive accepted you as being gay. but i havent accepted you as a vegetarian yet.
I've hooked up with 3 different guys already this week...don't tell me I haven't been a productive member of society
I've got my laundry in the car, tonights 1 night stand pre-req is an in suite washer and dryer. Let's do this!
This is going to be a 3 day beach sex fest. Do you understand
Kurt said to text you and encourage you to come out tonight. Encourage you with my rack.
It's really not cool dreaming about going into labor with your ex boyfriends love child as you're sleeping next to him.
I think I just got propositioned for sex by the lady behind the counter at dunkin donuts
I suppose we should both be prepared for the secret service to come visit us after this conversation. Hi NSA.
We're sitting in the bathtub, eating pizza, doing shots of vvodka and comparing nipples. I havfe never been so comfortable in my life.
My house is about to be spotless and the only person visiting is the plumber and not the porno kind.
Randomize
