Dude, we have the same penis size. Best friends for life.
90% of the problems in your life are directly related to your vagina
He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
I offered to go to AA with him...not because I am admitting I have a problem but because I want to see what they are saying about people like us.
no one is here. wer drinking in the beer garden in the dark and we stole a bucket of blue paint off the sidewalk. now her legs are blue.
Damn you and your Monday night power hours.
Also, you peed on your hand last night. Id just like to point that out
He had seven beers and tap-danced on the table like a pro. HOW DOES HE DO IT
Not sure if you're still doing the whole "sleeping with only one person" thing but if you're not we should sleep together when I get back in town tonight.
She's the queen of dating. She managed to get a date with a guy who saw her puke five times in two hours.
Broken leg sex is fun because I just get to lay there
I hope April is a better month for dicks. March has been very disappointing.
The good news is I woke up fully clothed, on top of my covers, with a half eaten granola bar. So, breakfast was waiting for me and I’m already dressed and ready to go today.
He kept saying "Ayyyyyyy" during foreplay... during sex.... during everything! It felt like I was having sex with friggin Fonzie from Happy Days!
Stranded. In bathroom stall. No toilet paper. I repeat NO TOILET PAPER! Assistance needed asap. GO! GO! GO!
Randomize
