It's not real sex if he's just convulsing inside of you.
I just saw the girl you left with - Chris Hansen's looking for you
how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
she gave me a schnouzer then wanted to kiss while we were having sex...i had to puppy slap her nose. pick me up out front.
Yeah true. Damn vaginas. They're ruining the world.
about to try to wax my asshole... wish me luck
its hard to take this fight seriously when one dude is an oompa loompa, and the other is a "g spot"
Some guy wearing a horse mask just knocked on my door and started whinnying. I opened the door and he was like, "...oh sorry, wrong room..." so awk.
in other news i'm homewrecking via instagram
So we played the stone cold theme song and continued to chug 2 beers at once and everyone just looked in shock
I feel like i'm walking on a never-ending field of baby sheep.
i dont know whats weirder. that i told him he stabbed me in my dream or that he told me i wasnt the first girl to tell him theyve been killed by him in a dream
I have someone saved in my phone as "This Hoe Ain'tit' Loyal" and I'm missing my superman boxers. Explain.
He started yelling "you tha man!" while I was reverse cowgirl
Nice classy night out before we roll our faces off
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