Partly cloudy chance of praying to the porcelin gods
i just walked with a girl who was carrying a chair down the street. apparently she got mad at the bartender and took the bar stool when she left.
I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
If relationships were based on ego stroking and meaningless sex, we'd be soulmates
Why does my right nut always hang lower than my left nut?
Like if I don't roll around in my puke, the night will be a failure.
Having drunken flash backs of me giving you a piggy back ride. I was like Jesus, and you were my cross. I fell so many times for you. This is true friendship.
when life gives you lemons, puke and rally.
just an fyi, false alarm on the whole ghonnorea thing. you're safe.
Sooo the theme of my 21st is rapidly becoming Gay Mexico
is it bad that my walk of shame involves the church shuttle?
Look man, sometimes you just gotta say "Sure! Why not? I can always take a shower afterwards"
he puked all over my guest bed and the said he felt good enough to clean it up. he poured bleach all over the bed and passed out in it. he had the chemiacal burn for a month...
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
You tried to see how many socks you can stuff in yor mouth and I just put on a damp sock. Is this what bestfriends have come to these days???
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