he said he wished he had more hands so he could firmly hold my boobs.
what did you hear about me?
that you are a very nice girl and a pleasure to be around
that was hard to say and not laugh
I woke up face down on my laptop with three windows open: itunes, chat roulette and redtube
She gave me head because I gave her my pack of cigarettes...And you said quitting would be hard.
We're having a serious conversation and I just responded to something he said with an emoticon. I am so baked.
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
Using the balance in my bank account I just calculated how many fifths of vodka I can buy this year. Don't let me buy food, all my money is reserved for alcohol
So, we estimated there is at least 40 pounds of boob in our house.
Blah blah blah. Just come home and put a baby in me.
She sleeps with her hand around my balls. First I thought it was just a comfort thing. Now I think it's to make sure I can't slip away in the middle of the night.
i think ive crossed the line from sexually frustrated to sexually furious
When he was going down on me I referred to him as "Lord Snow" and HE GOT IT. HE GOT THE GAME OF THRONES REFERENCE. I AM IN LOVE
Found a pic on my phone from last night. You're drunk. Arm wrestling some guy. In the bar bathroom. At a baby changing station. It's my new wallpaper.
Fuck it. I'm going for it. You're only young once, right?
You've been saying that for 5 years now. Let me know when the novelty wears off.
I'm going to blow a ton of money on sex toys just so I can tell you to do better than them.
Randomize
