I'm towing my little brother down the road on a sixty year old tractor, we're taking up the whole highway, and no one cares. I love South Dakota.
i'm as serious about my hair as jesse from full house.
that is uncle jesse to you, show some respect.
well judging by the amount of dired blood around my nipple rings i'm gonna assume it was a good night
he actually said the words "do you want to pet the lizard?" with a straight face as he unzipped his pants
I'be color coordinated the clothes in my closet and my underwear drawer. I'm like an advertisement for house arrest. Help.
Nurse helped me count all my sexual partners and still gave me her phone number. She shall be #73.
who started the 'put a scrunchy' around his balls' game?
Just successfully invited my mom to a drag show. If that doesnt say "im gay" then idk what will.
You need to stop thinking about the needs of your vagina and concentrate on the greater good
Naw but when she was in the bathroom I threw the condom out the window and I'm pretty sure it hit some girl
Do you think I could use my teacher of month Award to get free drinks?
I woke up on a park bench with a nice homeless guy waking me up. I bought us Carl's Jr. Best birthday ever!
Soooooooo high. David tried to rinse the water droplets out of the sink for 5 minutes
OMG WE ARE UP TO THREE MINORS WORKING HERE. I AM NOT READY FOR THIS MID LIFE CRISIS.
We left an ass print on the conference room table, but I don’t think anyone caught on
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