How can something that makes you feel so good one day make you feel so bad the next?
Alcohol?
Sex with a fat chick.
I got drunk and threw up on a kid at the amusement park. I think they're pressing charges.
no. i seriously look so gross with this sunburn. i wouldnt even wanna bang myself. and im really into myself.
He just slept in my bed for a couple hours and asked lots of questions about gay sex. No, I do not have his number.
she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
chlamydia ends and my period begins. this isnt real life
Fucking plugged the shower with taquitos I just threw up.
Lightning struck the tree right outside of her window as I came inside her. I think its God's way of saying go by plan b.
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
When did angry sex become our thing?
Why were my jeans in the freezer of the mini fridge, and how long have they been in there? On another note, I found my teacher's ID badge.
Not going to lie: not even the fact I'm wearing men's cargo pants can hide the fact I have an awesome ass.
Omg. I definitely just got hit on by my doctor AFTER he completed my pap smear which clearly showed I was in the middle of an outbreak. What. The. Fuck.
Am I the only person in the world that does not give a shit about the avengers?
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
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