is your mom at the bar?
lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
I just want to sing "highway to the danger zone" when I'm taking his pants off.
I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
you never realize your highschool teachers are real people till you fuck one of them
Wow, I just sneezed gum out of my nose. Wonder how long that's been up there.
Nothing like all your friends getting engaged to remind you how much fun sleeping around is.
i should teach a seminar on how to fall off the wagon
French fry pizza
Are you brilliant or just really high?
Can't it be both?
He said it. He actually said "yes it's in".
It's time for everyone's favorite Wednesday night game... WHEEL OF. VODKA!!!!!
You need a twittervention. You're better than this.
you ran up to the police and said "fuck the police shit we living in hell ". Then you dropped your Margarita and said "Darby Out" lol
She ripped her shorts off and yelled "VAGINA TIME!"
Randomize
