i jhust puked up my retainher.
Come with me and I'll find you a girl. What's your type?
Vagina
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
you sat in the middle of your kitchen floor feeding your dog blueberries one by one
i don't think they understood the house was collapsing. they kept dancing and jumping and asking for more cups.
SIMBAAAA REMEBER WHO YOU ARE
The silhouette of his dick looked like an eagle. Amurrican.
most desperate stoner moment might have been when we filled the bong up with pond water
desperate times, desperate measures
I told him I was going to sit on his face after I got out of the shower, he threw up the arm boners and yelled "STEVE HOLT!!" I might actually stop sleeping with other dudes.
I just did shots of fireball with my dad in a car wash. How's your pregaming going?
Drunk Karaoke resulted in only 8 injuries this time, so there is some improvement.
Her hotness level dropped from an 8 to a 2 as soon as I walked into her place. It REEKED of cat piss and there was no litter box and NO CATS.
I just watched my high school guidance counselor pee in the backyard of this party.
The cop took you back from the hospital and the lady at the front desk said "how are you doing cal?" You said "how do you know my name?" she responded "you're the only person i've ever seen that can throw up in your back pocket." Skills dude.
Somehow my life has turned in to drug deals at the bar, and illegally camping on a mountain because I have no where else to live.
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