You should dream of me :)
I'm going to dream of single life.
Billy Mays died!
I know. And the US is beating brazil...what's wrong with the world?
So we stole all of the newspapers out of the stands within a 1 mile radius and filled up her car with crumpled newspaper.
Who leaves their car unlocked at night?
Someone who wants to read the newspaper.
Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
The liquor store is having an inventory reduction sale. It would be a sin not to stop and help them out.
And we all know God doesn't like sinners.
Amen.
I know the scar will be in an obvious place, that's why I'm certain it'll score me cancer blowjobs
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
THERE IS SOMEONE IN MY CAR MILKING HERSELF AND TELLING ME TO TRY IT
If I get to the point of singing Man of Constant Sorrow then please god let me do it, record it, then cut me off.
I smoked out of two pipes at the same time while my friends wielded the lighters last night. It felt like I graduated to the next level of stoner.
You mowed a straight line through three yards because you were, and I fucking quote, "In the zone." I think they know.
I have a guy for practically everything... except for making me waffles on demand. will u be my waffle guy?
All the doctor said was why
I don't know what she did to me last night, but the scratches on my back indicate that I had sex with a Bengal tiger last night.
Randomize
