We traveled between two mile markers in 18 seconds. Do the math.
Did you fuck her?
If by "fuck her" you mean "threw up on her shoes," then yes, I achieved that.
I was worried if he didn't show me his penis, he would kill himself
The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
He held me the entire night. Not endearing kind of way. Like kidnapping or held hostage kind of way.
Okay well someone asked "IS HE HOMELESS?" about me so I need to try and find somebody.
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
I don't know what's worse the the fact he has worn a protective cup for last 3 years in fear of being kicked in the balls. Or the fact that the one day he decides to throw caution to the wind and doesn't wear it and actually gets kicked in the balls.
Who in tha hell do u hang out with?
My boobs are feeling quite sensitive so I told them, " you is smart, you is kind, you is important" that should do the trick.
And then after we fucked he wouldn't stop calling me "champ". It was like I had sex with an extremely attractive soccer coach
There is someone out there for you right now. And we will find her. Or him. Her. Her, we'll start with tits.
Nothing says "Jesus has forgiven your sins" like finding out you're not pregnant on Easter.
So about that you can bill me for the chair but it was David's idea to jump from the window sill into the washer with "clothing pillows of cloudiness" to land on to get ahold of him you have to phone his mother
I just talked to her she really hates you like a lot
when she didn't finish her burrito you wanted to call the cops because you said it was neglect
Randomize