I just woke up to crumpled tissues everywhere. Looks like it was another night filled with tears and semen.
Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
I called the bar to ask if they found my Id and credit card and they remembered me as 'the girl who signed her receipt in blood'
All I can tell you is you will need a rain slicker for tonight's festivities. Any clothes underneath would be highly frowned upon as well.
Sorry for walking in on you guys last night. FYI I have a bruise on my forehead from having the door slammed in my face. I deserved it.
After Thursday my breakup "don't screw anybody out of respect" month will be over and I will be set loose. My pussy is purring with anticipation.
I've been watching porn with my cat lately. No shame
They're magnificent. It's like god made her last but hadn't fulfilled his boob quota.
Bjs and tacos. That's my life.
About 98% sure I just walked by some dude jerking it in the library. I'm guessing his college experience isn't going as planned
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
I'm planning our wedding on the computer and our threesome on my phone. At the same time.
Come over.
Look lady I can't have sex with you EVERY day. I have things to do.
I've never met a penis that didn't think I was awesome.
I haven't felt more like a college student than when I woke up this morning naked with my sociology textbook in front of me and my bong in my left hand.
Randomize
