You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
I just crawled out of a second story window using a sheet and his clothes for a rope so he wouldn't wake up.
I am so glad I watched Macgyver as a kid.
I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
Hurry up I might actually study if I am left alone
i'm not sure if i'm mentally prepared for this.. politeness? proper grammar? book reader ? this is a whole new meaning of the species penis for me.
Who was that couple sleeping in your bed with us last night?
BEER BONG IN THE STOCKROOM COME IN TO WORK TODAY
You're in a tuxedo, you can pee wherever you want.
My father is flirting with a transexual server at hamburger mary's. We can never tell him.
We turned a watering can into a margarita bong.
I found my limit. I will not, in fact, blow my 78 year old professor for an A in his class.
I had a dream last night that Sam and Dean had to get rid of a murderous ghost haunting an elf on the shelf. I think I'm ready for Christmas to be over.
My aunt asked how many piercings I had and my mom said seven and I said nine and that's how my family found out I had my nipples pierced.
Thanks for letting me cross "getting high at park with children" off my bucket list
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