He looks like a mix between a retired piano teacher and a cat that just swallowed a sock.
We were playing flip cup on the nice dining room table. Losing team had to shamwow the table in between rounds
For once I'm glad there wasn't morning sex. Yes, that sore from the night before.
Yes, she did suck your dick in the bathroom to wake you up.
I will pray to the gods of eye bleach for you
told our landlord the hole in the wall was from your head during drunk sex..
how did he take it?
not as well as i would have thought
Im playing the how drunk can i get before my card declines game. being single sucks. But getting drunk after work alone in fridays on a wenesday night sucks way more.
I WAS JUST SITTING HERE BEING SNIFFED BY ODD WOMEN FOR A SOLID 5 MINUTES. My face was a twist of utter fear and confusion...
Someone want to explain the bottle of ranch I found in my pants
We were so drunk that when I broke the bottom off a pint glass we decided to make it into a candle holder. How does that happen?!
He's claiming he can open a beer bottle with anything. He's been trying for a while now with a power rangers action figure and he is just cutting the hell out of his hand. There is blood all over billy
By this time next year I expect us to have full time jobs that we can call out of so we can day drink on beautiful days like this. Oh, and grill.
JUST BECAUSE I LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED DOESNT MEAN IM GOING TO LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED AT WORK
you flipped over the sheets and there was my bed. filled with ding dongs.
Woke up with a grilled cheese in my hand, it was like god giving me a high five for the night before
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