Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
I was at circle k buying gas and this girl in a papa johns uniform comes up and is like " I've got a bunch of extra pizzas. Large peperoni for $5." then she went to her trunk and pulled one out. It felt like a drug deal for a fat person
Hooked up with my old baby sitter last night, so what do I do? As I was sucking her tits I decided it would be a good idea to say " goo goo gah gah"....it wasn't a good idea.
Supposedly i was taking multiple birth control pills while screaming dot judge me. Never going back
Wow thanks 4 throwing jello at me an yelling who invited that guy to all the guys at the bar
Hahhaha I literally just rolled outta bed and went to get beer in my pj's and slippers. God I love graduating
... I went down on him at the movies. I feel like Alanis Morisette.
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
omg I just had an epiphany about why I grew into such a whore....
HAVE YOU EVER NOTICED WHAT THE SPICE GIRLS USED TO WEAR?!? those were my idols, I never stood a chance
it's like my freshman wet dream come true
I just remember dedicating a shot to me giving you head so it was obviously a good night
This is not 2004 anymore. It's not acceptable to get fingered while watching 'Ferngully' in a basement full of your friends.
He gave me the choice between a threeway with his best friend or a tiny turtle. Unfortunately I chose the threeway.
I saw his new girlfriend. She was flashing people, short and kinda chubby. I was happy with my life after that.
You poured all their beer into ziploc baggies so it would be "better on the go"
Randomize