Just made a drug deal by throwing my money to my dealers window and receiving weed the same way. We are the definition of typical lazy stoners.
and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.
how do i tell him I'm always in the mood without sounding like a slut?
I woke up to blood crusted on my face. I don't understand
team rage. no explanation necessary
my nipple ring is gone but someone was nice enough to replace it with a paperclip
I assume it was your influence that had me go from DD to waking up out on the deck with one eyebrow shaved off??
just used my sex toy cleaning solution to clean my reading glasses. midterms are cramping my styleeee
He just got dropped off drinking a flask, sitting on the handlebars of a chinese delivery man's bike
Tonight's gonna be epic. Did he bring my noodles?
The number of people who end up getting laid as a result of the cha cha slide....is terrible.
That's what you get for dating construction workers you meet in tunnels.
I found a half composed text to you this morning and all it said was HELP M. Is that how I ended up at the bottom of the stairwell in only a tee-shirt and one heel?
considering I never received the text I would go with 'yes'.
He's not letting me leave till I cum. I am a hostage to my own vagina
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
My boss and I ended up at the same strip club. We both got lap dances while talking about work.
My purse is full of condoms and money.
I like where this is going...
Randomize