I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
Her boobs were tiny. I could have used her bra as a blind fold. Which in hindsight would have made things a lot better.
i had a dream that i had so much marijuana that i didn't know what to do with it. i woke up and cried.
I think I might.. possibly.. like a Justin Bieber song.
I think you might... possibly... have sprouted a vagina.
we boned then he told me that he had a thing for my gay roommate. worst night ever
I'm drinking and throwing an enormous tennis ball at children. I couldn't be happier.
He ate me out. IN THE MORNING. I love less attractive men.
He broke into my house just to tell me the door was locked.
I'm high and dancing to practical magic. Your needs for my penis can wait.
Your brother just walked into my room, pissed drunk and butt naked, got into my bed and fell asleep. In knowing I am gay, you have one hour to deal with him before I do
We ended the night eating peanutbutter with our hands and smoking cigarettes in the house at 4am. Fucking Everclear, man.
While he was fucking me, he just stopped and said, "Mike says Hi." Then proceeded to fuck me.
What did you do?
What do you say to that!? But, when I came, I screamed out my full name.
No, it's okay that he's on a date. I attach no more emotion to him than I do my vibrator.
Nows a good time to tell him. Just be like "yeah, I used to bang her too and it didn't work out for us either". He'll understand.
Randomize
