Successfully pulled the houdini tonight. Check that off my list.
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
is it bad i banged a 25yr kindergarten teacher last night?
No thats like a top 10
Margaritas are 250 calories. Now measuring all food in margaritas
Dude, I think someone on your skype account may have seen me beat off. I used your computer and didnt realize you were still signed in. Please tell me no one was on...
If a hot cougar texts u and says "back massage, blow job".... you show the fuck up.
It's like the blind leading the senile over here.
UPDATE: shit just got real- grandma is threatening to beat grandpa with a wooden spoon covered in chili.
You're about to makeout with my vagina, I don't think she cares that you haven't brushed your teeth. Just get over here!
He made me choke him and call him Papi..so all in all a good night.
I just want someone to put their head on my boobs and laugh at my jokes ....
I hooked up with a guy named Quan.. I literally hit the Quan
She puked off the side of the cruise ship onto a newlyweds balcony table and they watched it all happen then they made her clean it up
how is it I left wearing underwear then ended up with none? and why is it they are on you?
Look idk the rules and regulations of our freindship...but I need you to carry me to my car.
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
Randomize
