watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
I like how you try to look sexy and just end up looking like a weird boy.
Youre on making sure I dont black out around fat chicks duty
It finally happened. My conscience stopped working. I've never felt so free
I just realized that my phone was set to Brazilian time...what the fuck happened last night
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
Bad idea to be in a car concussed. I just described his dick as an elevator. I think i meant escalator, i dont know
This is John, I met you downtown last night.
Oh, ok.
This is the cop that kept you out of trouble last night
I'll get you through man, I'll be your fairy godmother with better prescription drugs
ok thanks goodnight
Also before you go to bed i just have to get it out there that i really like macklemore as a person
Sending dick pics while driving a car going 80 in the rain at night to a married woman? Why hello 2014
You declared your undying love to a drag queen, then proceeded to puke into the poor man's purse.
That's Danny the boy who threw up in the Doritos bag
I put on a face mask and masturbated for an hour... my face now has a green tint
Tequila shots and throwing it at a bell.
This is dumb. I'll keep doing it.
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