Uggggg i want to leave and get bombed over baghdad
things that need to be invented #43: vodka that also acts as birth control.
its like my vagina has this homing beacon out to all the guys saying "come find me, i havent been shaved in weeks"
can't believe I ate straight coffee grounds to stay awake for that
Just bought myself a coach diaper bag. I thought it would be perfect for school. the baby bottle holders are where i'm gonna put my booze
I wasn't expecting a boner of this magnitude
are we at that level where i can tell you your girlfriends tits looked really good yet?
when we got back we had sex. but it wasnt til the morning that i figured out her leg was broken
Living room yoga. I'm too hungover to deal with anyone else's chi today.
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
So your brother is gay after all... Just caught him making out with my brother... Apparently he's gay too
See, I'm just thinking of how...angular my room is. You probably would have sustained brain damage
Adderal can only make me focus so much. Your ass is stronger than my medicine. Congratulations.
I know I joke about running from my problems a lot but I'm 3 miles off-campus and need a ride
You proposed a left ass cheek firmness contest and got a surprising number of contestants. Then you ruined it by groping someone who wasn't playing and awarding them first place.
Randomize
