yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
hey, we don't wanna leave the house because we're watching fireworks on tv. this is america.
he recorded me cumming with the t-pain app on his iphone
did you dip my ponytail in franzia? its the only thing i can think of to explain my hair right now.
I have a cut on my head from a tambourine.
Tip of the day: Don't ever send a bootycxall at 3 in aftnoon. No one will respond n u'll just feel fooolish.
Don't ask me how, but I have a squirrel in my backpack and I don't know what to do with it.
Not only is he in the circus, the man survived a near death experience and has an accent. She might as well have found a unicorn. This shit just doesn't happen in real life. Where did she meet this magical creature?
You are so predictable. I am willing to bet 20$ that instead of going out you are sitting on your couch, stoned, watching Seinfield re-runs and eating cheezits.
1. they're goldfish. 2 fuck you
My roomate has me out looking for easter kegs hidden arround town
Dude, that was like bongs ago.
I just tried to roll over and fell off the bed. I think that is the beds way of kicking me out
How do I say "I want to suck your balls" in a classy but sexy way,
I'm to the point where I just want to get back at him in a hot man sex tornado way.
It was weird, it was like my heart got a boner. Is this being an adult?
Randomize
