I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
idk if you're aware of this...but we could potentially have the greatest hate sex...ever.
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
It's a sign that no dudes december is about to start: I have a yeast infection.
Just remembered seeing jalepenos in my vomit last night. Reminded me to thank you for sharing your queso with me. You're a good friend.
You're in a tuxedo, you can pee wherever you want.
Am I allowed to compare getting cum'd on the face to a warm summer rain?
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
My VP dropped me off at the Strip Club in Houston. Just said "I was never here".
Drunk me really does appreciate that sober me made a list of movies to watch when drunk it saves so much time
You are the best. Or certainly adequate for tempering my unholy desires.
That's the nicest thing you've ever said to me.
woke up to my little sister's best-friend's boyfriend in my bed, but how's your saturday going?
nothing like waking up to a voice mail saying your std test came back negative
I'll keep supplying drugs if you teach me piano.
Randomize
