Nailed a drunk college girl before the CU game Saturday, and a drunk married woman after the Broncos game Sunday.
Some perfection is debatable.
please take me off your list of people to text when you don't want to drink by yourself.
She had a boyfriend but was all over this drunk guy that she just met..she said she loved him and then puked all over him.
She woke up with blood running down her face and asked the EMS guy where the keg was
Are you dead or are you taking another 13 hour nap? you need to let me know these things ahead of time so i dont worry.
i just feel like it would be irresponsible for you to not have sex with me again.
My vagina agrees.
WHERE ARE MY FUCKING EYEBROWS?!
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
Just be aware that next year I will probably try to seduce you to avoid going to the gym
I'm drinking wine from the cap of my laundry detergent container, wearing my bed sheet as a cape. How do you think I'm taking it?
Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
I still have the video of you three making soup in my kitchen and asking random people for permission DURING the party, not after like usually
Don't remember, didn't happen
I HAVE THE VIDEO YOU DICK IT HAPPENED
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
You can't just say "I scored us a potential threesome" and then not text me back.
We walked 3 miles to the strip club. Stopped for roadies, it wasn't that bad.
Randomize