hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
Do you think if I drink bleach they will let me leave work?
awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
just a forewarning-if you come home and hang out with your stupid girlfriend the entire time that you are here/fail to get wasted with us i will wish either death upon you or that you truly do turn gay when you return to the navy.
he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
Just slept with my boyfriend's roomie to learn if bf was cheating on me
Good plan. When in doubt, sleep about.
So many stories. To uyou are sober. I heart you though. Jesus. Dirrty dancing jusyt came oine!!no. Lie.
I lost track of him after he threw the handful of pennies at the 2 female cops and ran into the darkness. I heard a tazer and a scream. All that is left is his flip flop. Its like hes drunken man-derella.
not now. havin a heart to heart with drunk fred flinstone
So that groomsmen was naked under his kilt. Also I just had sex in the elevator. And yes, those two updates are definitely related.
Also, I would just like to reiterate my apologies for tearing up in the grocery store.
Totally forgot I asked the cop for a theoretical fist bump and he still let me drive away
the bandages come off on Tuesday. we can try out my new breasts then.
So I ate half a jar of mayo because I thought it would cure a hangover. I thought wrong.
I just remembered that before we left my house I vowed to stay fully clothed and I FAILED
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