Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
He gave a passionate hug to every tree on the way to my car.
we're doing beer bongs from the windmill...epic
Dude she looks like a female richard gere plus 400 pounds.
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
You are literally throwing a tangerine right now. Beer pong is not played this way
Ok! I picked up an anti-celebratory bottle of champagne on the way to dinner for her going to rehab. That's how I feel about this...
THEY NOW HAVE MIXED DRINK EMOJIS! LIFE IS GOOD! PRINCESSES DON'T DRINK BEER
Honestly I'm not even that excited to see my boyfriend. I'm more excited to see his penis. His penis inside of me.
We exchanged snapchat usernames instead of numbers. Is that what America has come to?
so I ate shit in the bar and took a barstool down with me and this guy helped me up and I just started making out with him. I need to stop meeting men like that
I just found out two girls I dated met each other, bonded over how much they hate me, started dating and are gonna get married soon.
Is this what it's like to be an adult? You plan out play dates for your vagina?
Also while I’m drunk I saw your penis in like 4th grade when I walked past the boys bathroom
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
who are you?
Randomize
