I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
P.S. I can't hear my feet
Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
for future reference: playing drunken strip-twister is a euphemism for a threesome. just thought you should know.
Well apparently I'm no fun since I won't have a threesome with him and my mother.
Your christmas gifts are already wrapped, how on top of my shit am I?
I'm hungover as fuck and had to break into my own house by throwing a cinder block through my back door at 4am. You're more on top of your shit than me.
I'm pretty sure they kept making references about gangbanging me but I was too stoned to catch on, I just sat there and stared at his kitten.
I mean, two foreign guys have drunkenly confessed their love for her, so she's clearly doing something right.
So they just told me that while I was being loaded into the ambulance the cop told them if they were good friends they'd post it on Facebook...
The subtweets were good enough
It would have been nice to break the dry spell with nice, civilized, sober sex somewhere other than on my friend's couch.
Like I owe him sex. Hell fucking no. I owe myself sex. With a celebrity. Or a clean pornstar. Who knows.
so apparently over the course of the night my roommate and i had sex in exactly the same spot. ps the downstairs sink needs cleaning.
It's bullshittery. It's asshattery. It's complete fuckery at its finest.
Randomize
