I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
I swear I have "I love assholes" written on my forehead with ink that only guys can see.
she needs to learn to take compliments like she takes dicks.
Haha im sorry. Its just financially responsiable to bang him instead of you right now.
We can't have sex anymore. The amount of money I've spent on meds and copays for UTIs is getting ridiculous
this cock blocking thing really has to end bro...its one thing to tell jen i live with my mom.. its another to cut the brakes on my car..
You were definitely doing something right. You could only see the colored parts of his eyes a couple of times. I was pretty sure he was dead at some point.
We should celebrate the resignation of Berlusconi tonight with too many bottles of wine and sambuca. We're allies, right?
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
I have too much respect and admiration for my dick to put it into a situation where he could possibly be killed
Jesus christ it's been two texts and we are already talking about dildos
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
Is he gonna be my crazy ex? Cause we weren't even together for as long as my weeklong bicurious lesbian relationship.
She thinks you guys are the gods of the bathroom. If she runs past you naked, give me a heads up
Pretty sure I was naked for most of the night.....success
Randomize
