god help us all. i just saw an infant wearing a onesie that said "i don't know who my daddy is"
How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
Obama just said the words "we're all in this together." I wanted to start singing high school musical
I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home
Dont judge me. Him and his friends got me drunk for free, the least i could do was suck his dick
just snorted lines off a mancala board. I'm destined to win this game.
When we found you, you were using the bottle of Captain as a pillow...with a note on your forehead that said don't wake up the champion.
It's not slutty if it's for workout purposes...right?
The fact that every guy you've slept with since you've lost virginty either have the same first or last name isn't normal.
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
After fooling around at the hotel til dawn, I managed to feed her with my free buffet passes. Tastes like sweet victory.
Dude...are you really going to start sexting during our friend's memorial service?
I told the cops they couldn't arrest me until they found my shoe. Now I have the grant county cops looking for my heels by the rail road tracks.
Good luck. While you're suffocating on a dick, I'll be eating pizza rolls. Being a good girl.
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
Randomize
