Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
Its 6am and I'm sitting on the couch watching Clifford. Crying into my risotto because emily elizabeth helped the girl in the wheelchair get over her stagefright so she can win a trophy. Never drinking alone again.
They walked in to the store, ripped up the phone book, and left. Can we get on their level?
she's a kindergarten teacher now. The teacher desks are the perfect height for fucking. I'm delaying the break up a few weeks.
I'm a lady, I can't pee on the ceiling. Even I don't have that power.
Alright we have to be drunk.before noon tomorrow. Its a new law i just got passed through congress. It goes into effect imediately
Right but I don't wanna waste the whole weekend not having sex when we could be having sex
if you didn' use the plastic sword on the cop. maybe this wouldn't have happened.
Do I really need this much space in my mouth?
Are you already high?
Found an old burrito under my bed
You are a sick fuck
I actually had to apologize for "being too aggressive about harry potter"
I'm slowly getting to where I don't hate people anymore.
Never mind. Some random dude just walked past me and asked if I was having fun. I snarled at him. I might still kinda hate people.
At least I got steroids and a baguette out of the deal
How high?! We watched paid programming for 45 minutes before we realized it wasn't just a long commercial. So pretty high. The Bionic fish finder looks promising, though.
Lets get a boat first.
You invited these random guys into your apartment that you met in the hallway...& then you started screaming at them to get out cause you didn't know who they were.
Randomize
