Didn't tell him I was on my period. Then had to surreptitiously remove some uterine lining from his cock.
Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
you didnt know i had herpes?
i am positive it's ok to drink. it's just pieces of the plastic knife i forgot was in the blender.
If I knew losing weight would mean this many fucking creepers I would've just stayed fat.
We had to put his head at the bottom of the driveway so the puke would run down. Now he's sleeping outside.
For my job application I just put "community gardener- personal business" for my previous work experience in place of the neighborhood pot grower/distributor
Sorry I pulled the thermostat off the wall..
Your vase full of piss was still at his house and he still doesn't know.
Only you would have a vasectomy while you're awake and report on the soundtrack first
I wish everyone could suck his dick. It was an honor.
We broke the bed while I was handcuffed to the headboard and let's just say that was a hard one to explain to the RA
If its not for food we ain't going out.
who knew rolling through the dorm on a scooter in footie pajamas would attract so many guys. he said i'm his soulmate.
You were just laying there on the air mattress watching spongebob with a knife. We tried to take it from you, but you insisted it was your emergency escape in case you started to float off.
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