Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
i guess its not very common for a paramedic to have to revive someone who was struck by a falling shampoo bottle while getting off from the bathtub faucet.
tiger just fucked it up for all of us...she grabbed my phone this morning and started asking questions.
Just saw a bouncer shoot a stripper with a squirt gun. He looked at me n said,"gotta keep em in check." I'm in love with this place
just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle
He grabbed onto my boobs while slipping on ice then proceeded to drag me down with him I'm not predicting head in his future
Haha that's why you never name the penis. Its like a pet, once named you will most likely get attached.
I'm pretty sure I'm the first person in the history of this college to rollerblade their walk of shame.
Apparently I send drunk snapchats a lot and they always have random dudes in them. Like one night it was just me and some guy I don't know sitting on my couch.
I know I've become a responsible adult because this time, I'm not going to do the drugs I found on the ground
I just need to find someone whose kink is financial submission.
I decided we werent gonna go for round 5 when he started trying to have a serious conversation about how blessed he is to have such a nice penis
He has a point, the man's penis is a legend.
I just lived through a real life episode of jersey shore.
so he found out i have him as "average size" in my phone. fair to say we arnt going to be dating anymore
He lasted less than 30 sec. in bed and then sent me a friend request on LinkedIn. Wtf.
Randomize