Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
so i'm just gonna leave my credit card in your mailbox so you can bail me outta jail.. deal?
Hooking up with one of the deadbeat dads from Teen Mom does not qualify as banging a celebrity.
And I was the only one who felt it was dangerous to set the tv and blender on the ledge of the hot tub
I woke up to find that chris drank one of my contacts.
Yeah he's good at that.
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
I just made SCOTCHSICLES. no further info is necessary
Based on the grey fur I pulled from my teeth, I think her vagina has mice.
I'm a hopeless romantic that likes rough sex. Judge me
I woke up this morning with a tampon in my nose and food EVERYWHERE...
No it was fine, I've just never seen that many people eat dog food
I think pants incapable of making pants work
I never want to even look at fireball again because it reminds me of the night I died and then lived to tell the tale of how I died.
Through a complicated series of events, I wound up in the desert with a blue chick from comic-con. we lost peter. if you're alive, please come get us.
Randomize
