i mean you're really good at taking the morning after pill...so you could put that on your resume..
yeah, i think fast in a bad sitatuion and am able to react with appropriate measures
Who keeps a bong in their car??
Kids who graduated high school two weeks ago.
my shit smells like andre
standing in line at subway, they've got 'stand up and get crunk' blaring. the lines out the door and everyone is dancing. Lombardi Gras rules.
I thought about donating plasma but thats not the way i want to find out that i have aids
He was sitting at the table eating ice and said, "I'm pretty sure everyone in my family has nipples."
Snorting lines of xanex off the back of my grandparents toilet before church. Thinking of u.
All those movies are bullshit, there is no way to run down a line of parked cars, they`re too far apart. my faces hurts so much right now
No man we're leaving now. The party will probably be busted soon. O and a bitch started throwing knives around the place, like real actual knives.
I tried to order champagne at IHOP last night
The name of the man in your bed is not Ryan. I can't remember what his name is but that is wrong
Besides, I'm booked tomorrow. I'm planning on drinking heavily and crying in the bath.
WHAT KIND OF DEALER ONLY WORKS FRI-SUN???
Ours, apparently.
He sends me the same inspirational quote quotos that my grandma does. I no longer want to tap that.
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
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